Tuesday, February 17, 2009


I know things on my blog are scattered. That is my mind set right now. There is so much going on right now.
Two weddings, yes I said two. There certain things that one needs to do. Besides the relief in the second bride's face was worth it, at least for now. I have to make my dress for the first wedding. I have everything cut out, I just need to put it together. Haha I sew and curses fly out of my mouth. I should record it some time so you can see. The second wedding needs a lot of help in the planning stage. I am willing to help her. I am a sucker at times. It makes things difficult, but I love to see others happy, even if it means sacrificing myself. I know, stupid girl you come first. Years of training take some undoing.
I really want to loose weight. I need to loose weight. My body suffers everyday because of the extra weight is hauls around, my breathing labors because of it. The pain I experience in every moment of the day is due at least partially to my weight. And a vey broken part of me must think I deserve it because I keep eating and eating, not exercising. I did start taking Alli and that seems to be doing something. So I have at least taken the first step.
My job is in a state of constant flux. I work for a chemical company that also sells fiberglass products. Our profits have been falling. Whose aren't? They just let one of my coworkers go on Monday. I got serious flash backs. I have worked for 2 other companies that went out of business. I watched people go and then before I knew the doors were closed. Not sure what I will do if that happens. I guess I will burn that bridge when I come to it.
We got a new car. 2003 red impala. She is pretty. I love her. At the end of July, we are moving to a home of our, something we have never had. There has always been roomates or family. I don't want to loose this opportunity.
Then there is my dancing. Not last on my list, but it is. Only because the other things keep jumping in front of it. When I dance, I love it. Even if I am just chair dancing. I feel graceful and beautiful. Well not all the time, sometimes I feel goofy and silly, but I mean to feel that way.
And somehow through all these things I must peace. Not sure how to go about it. I know it come from within but my in is too scattered. Silly viscious circle.


  1. You should come over and sew with me! We can curse together. lol. Thank you so much for doing it. I guess I can't do anything the easy way. HA.
    Good luck with the second wedding.
    You should be as good a friend to you as you are to me. :)

  2. I completely understand where you are coming from - wanting to help your friends with their weddings. I have been through that a few times myself and its hard to be there for everything they need and yourself, too. I am so thankful that for now, I am the only single friend left and I really hope that when my turn comes to walk down the aisle, they are there for me. Good luck!!



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